The Way Things Are



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Refresh my bowels.
2006-07-19, 5:07 p.m.

Thank you all for the recipe and dinner ideas. FYI: were having chicken teriyaki tonight. Chicken AGAIN? Yes, Im afraid its true. However, chicken teriyaki is a meal that my picky Lil Guy loves, and hell even eat the vegetables that come with it, so for today at least, its chicken.

In case I hadnt mentioned it, were cruising our way through Season 2 of 24. What was that, like 2002? Does anybody out there remember that season? With the nuclear bomb? Do you remember the best line from Season 2? It is this: Im going to need a hacksaw. We go around saying this at home, and then well tack on and a bowling bag.

OK, so lets see. Chicken? Check. Watching TV? Check. Working? Havent really mentioned it, but check.

GOD I have to get a life. If I could really go in-depth about work, I could regale you with stories that would leave you agape and agog, and possibly ajar, but I cant do that.

We do have actual Plans for Fun this weekend (the golf club is having some kind of a what I can only describe as a shindig. Its not so much the shindig, as it is the people who will be there. Im sure Ill have interesting things to talk about on Monday. But until then, you are stuck with me, and chicken, and watching TV, and obliquely referring to work-related happenings. I suppose I could post naked baby pictures of myself if I get really desperate for content.

****

But that is all I have for you today. Its not that I just dont have time for you, for you are my ALL, but I really need to pee, and wash my hands of course (oh God, yes, and pull up my pants), and then Im going to hit the road. Mr. Surly went out of town, so we have Lil Guy for the whole next week. I dont usually have him on Wednesdays, so I can sit here and daydream and entertain you, but not today.

I will tell you this: Wednesday nights are Bible study, and after about 45 minutes, I get bored, and start looking in the index of my Good Book for interesting words, and then I spend my time looking up the verses to see how the particular words are used in context. Last weeks word was bowels, which appears a surprising number of times. Heres my favorite; its Philemon 1:20: Yea, brother, let me have joy of thee in the Lord: refresh my bowels in the Lord.

I had found that one previously, and after last weeks scholarly endeavor, learned that thats really the best bowel verse. I sit there in church, like a really disrespectful 14-year-old, look up my favorite bowel-related Bible verse, catch DWs attention, and then discreetly point it out to him. He always snickers and rolls his eyes.

Every now and then at home, Ill excuse myself by saying Im going to go refresh my bowels, and wander off down the hall toward the bathroom. Hey! I am totally going to needlepoint that verse on a little sampler, and hang it in the powder room at home. Do you think Ill go to hell for that? Please provide your opinion in the comments.

Laura Flea is going to hell because shes delighted by the word bowels being used in the Bible:

Yes
No
Maybe

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