The Way Things Are






Welcome home(y)
2004-11-03, 4:28 p.m.

Oh! Woo HOO? Yes, I'm in. Dear Diary, it's been eleventy hundred days and hours since we last spoke. Here are some things that have happened in the past few months:


Yes, crickets. That's it. The sound of crickets. Um, I turned 40 on August 1st, and DW threw me a big-ass surprise party. I don't know if I told you about that. I did tell you I was afraid of it, but it was nothing to be afraid of.

I, um, I closed a big deal at work yesterday. Well, not "I" specifically. I sat in on it and signed some things. "I" actually play a very small part in the deal, unless you count property tax exemption, which is a big thing.

So how about those elections? It didn't surprise me, and frankly, my pets, I did vote for W., for 1) this is freaking Texas. It's what we do. But that's no excuse, so on to 2) Kerry didn't really impress me at ALL. If the Dems had presented a fabulous candidate - one who(m?) I could not refuse, I would have voted for him or her. Alas, ear wax. And 3) there's a lot of big shit going on. How smart would it be to change horses in mid-stream and fuck things up even more? Not very, is all I'm saying. So if I have to choose between "He Who Is Already There" and "Not So Great", and they are both not so great, I'm going for the Not So Great that's already had 4 years to figure out his way around and learn how to use the phones and everyone's names and all.

And enough about politics from me. I apologize in advance - I care, but not that much. I've been voting for 20 years...I have been an adult for most of those 20 years...I've been self-supporting for 20 years...and no Pres has ever had a big impact on my life. The economy goes up and down. Wars are fought and lost or won. I really think these things will happen regardless of who's in the big house. Big decisions are made by the Supreme Court, and yes, they are appointed by the Pres, but those guys live a LONG TIME. There's very little turnover there. They survive from president to president.

It may be flawed reasoning, but there has never been an issue in my life that I have looked to the Pres for a solution. I work in the affordable housing field, for the love of Pearl. Republican presidents don't have a negative impact on affordable housing, although you might imagine that they would. Policies and programs are put into place, and the next pres in line doesn't really impact that. We veer to the left, feint to the right, but things don't really change that much from who's sitting at the desk in the fancy office.

I really believe decisions with big impact are made on a much more local level. Banning aluminum cans from the river. Freezing property taxes for the elderly and handicapped. Establishing the left hand lane for passing only. Leash laws. Zoning.

Heinous. I love the word heinous, because it combines the silliness of hiney with anus. Heinous. Hee. Oh wait, where was I?

Oh, I am not going back to politics. Except to say that DW and I agree for the most part on our political beliefs, philosophically, deep down, but he is insane! He is! He's the most conservative anti-government libertarian type I've ever seen. Hello? McFly? Public education. Affordable housing, the production of which PAYS OUR BILLS. All those nice roads we drive on. Public health, you know, the requirement that we all get vaccinated for various blight and disease and mange? That is good stuff. He will actually sit there and argue with me on that. So we don't talk about it. It's just maddening, and then he starts vaguely quoting the Bible, and I have to remind him that Republicans, Democrats, liberals, conservatives, and welfare are NOT IN THERE. Taxes, yes. Building codes, no.

Ay. He maddens me with frustration and desire, that DishWasher. And who has lost 15-20 pounds in the last 18 or so months? Yes, that's my DW. He's my skinny little tiny husband. Now I'm the fat one. Who da thunk it?

But, here's another accomplishment in the last bajillion days and weeks since we've talked here...I did Slim in 6, cousin to P90, and have stuck with it pretty well the last six weeks, and well, I've lost at least a pound, and one inch off my waist. That's pretty good.

The irony that you cannot detect from your vantage point is the fact that as I wrote about my exercise success, the Wurstfest ad was playing on the radio, and I was thinking to myself "Mmmmm, pork chops. Sausage. Beer. Beer. Beer. Beer. Beer."

I told Don the other day that if I had enough time on my hands, I could become an alcoholic because I love to drink, and I love the idea of drinking, so much. I actually love the idea of drinking a beer or a glass of wine, and the idea of going to a trashy bar and getting, well, trashed. Even more than actually doing those things, I enjoy the anticipation. Anyway, Don told me that I really wouldn't make it as an alcoholic because it takes a LOT of effort, a LOT of determination, a LOT of practice. You have to stay drunk all the time and screw up your job, and your children and your relationships. You have to go to jail. And he can't see me dedicating that much to something so bad.

I cracked open a MichUltra and just nodded in agreement. You know, after 2 or 3 beers, I curl up on the couch and go to sleep. So not much determination or effort or dedication to the brew will come from me.

Does your elbow ever hurt from sitting on your ass all day long, screwing around and resting your arm on your computer? Oh, mine doesn't either, but I heard of some guy one time...

I keep smelling food and it's making me hungry. I might have to jet out of here and go home(y) and eat. There has been very little work accomplished here this week so far. I did good last week, but not so good this week. But I was closing! The Big Deal! For 2 days! Wherein I sat in a conference room and cracked jokes with the lawyers and contributed my signature to documents every now and then. So there was much money changing hands, but I didn't get a whole hell of a lot done. So my decision is this: stay here, try to get some shit done, and go home kinda late, or go home now and fortify myself with frozen pizza and prepare for the long, hard day tomorrow.

A compromise: I'll work for an hour and then go home.

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