Jane - 2006-03-10 15:24:44
They make cropped pants that are like nice pants only shorter. I got mine at Old Navy, one gray, one khaki. Around here we wear them with well-groomed bare legs, fabulously pedicured feet, and high heeled, open toed shoes/sandals. And they are very dressy. You can also wear beautiful summery skirts with the leg/feet requirements. You are not old enough to be worrying about clothes being "too young" for you. I forget how to paragraph break, but as far as the friends thing? It is not your imagination--it is difficult to make new friends at our age. They did a whole Oprah show on it.
laura - 2006-03-10 15:44:05
God, I love you. You're my life coach. My non-hugging life coach.
EB - 2006-03-10 15:46:26
I agree with Jane on the dressing up cropped pants and summery skirts with high-heeled open-toed shoes or sandals. You can dress up a lot with your shoes and purse, and if you're worried about hot, swollen feet, don't be because EVERYONE'S feet are hot and swollen in San Antonio in the summertime. Also, go to Old Navy, Gap, Banana, Ann Taylor, etc., online and check out their outfits for casual workdays. Those should give you some good ideas. This all makes me so wish I were closer to home so I could go shopping with you. I don't know how to paragraph break either, but regarding girlfriends, it is indeed difficult to make new friends as an adult. But sometimes you just need to be patient and persistent until a friendship happens. You saw how long it took me to get into a groove out here in North Carolina, but I stuck with the officers' wives' things even though I hated it at first and now I love the women and have so much fun at the various functions. I also even have some girlfriends out here finally! So, stick with it and don't give up after what you percieve as a snub. You may even be asking someone as shy as you who just doesn't know how to respond! One thing I did a few times to draw some people out of the woodwork out here was to organize some girl-only outings to local wine tastings or whatnot and I hosted the wives event at my house a couple of months ago. That really helped with the friend situation to be the instigator for a few group functions. I know you weren't asking for advice on that, so sorry for throwing in an unsolicited two cents!
laura - 2006-03-10 15:57:15
No, I'm totally asking for advice on that. Thanks, EB! That's what I want to know - what I'm supposed to be doing.
LL - 2006-03-10 16:12:23
My summer wardrobe consists of knee-length skirts (usually a-line), cropped pants, fitted tees and flip-flops ("nicer" and not-so-"nicer".) My office is pretty casual and I have a job that doesn't require customer contact and does occasionally require me to crawl around on the floor. (To get to the cabling, you pervs.) Not only are you not old enough to worry about dressing "too young", you're also so cute and petite that you can get away with a lot that a, uh...statuesque woman such as myself can't. Friends? Uh..I have no idea. I'm battling the same sort of deal right now. Hey! I know! Let's make a club!! The "I Have No Friends Club" !!!!
laura - 2006-03-10 16:19:19
LL, have you heard of LUPEC? Ladies United for the Preservation of Endangered Cocktails? This was one of those Blogging for Books entries - got 2nd place, I think, and all I can think of is LUPEC. I think alcohol might be the great common denominator to having friends.
Syllie - 2006-03-10 16:56:30
Making friends is definitely harder as an adult, and I agree, I've found you really have to be proactive about. You may or may not recall, several years ago when many of my friends had moved away and/or got into serious relationships I felt like I had virtually no social life. That's when I started doing a bunch of volunteering, took a writing class, joined JL, and joined my supper club. Some of those things worked out better than others, but I ended up with a great writing group which was both a good social and creative outlet for awhile, and as you know, I adore my supper club. I have become close friends with a couple of those women, one of whom my friendship with spawned my whole immediate circle of friends I have now. You just never know where it will come from. I say you start a supper club. You can check out the Supper Club Hub bulletin board on the Cooking Light magazine website and post to start one, if it is your wont to do.
Krissy - 2006-03-10 17:13:32
I'm a good friend for that sort of thing. I'm happily married so no worries about "other" connotations or uncomfortability. I'm too old for the bullshit, so I don't bother. I'm very loyal and don't have a problem going for long periods of time without talking and then suddenly picking up where we left off.
Unfortunately I'm in Chicago.
I think everyone else is right-on with the capris - manicured feet - high-heeled sandle advice. Pink is also good. I recommendeth pink.
LL - 2006-03-10 20:01:05
LUPEC you say? Hm...there has been a bewildering lack of martinis in my life lately. Maybe I should go out in search of a few.
Heather - 2006-03-11 11:24:32
Just wanted to say thanks for the note (and the prod) -I do figure no one really notices. :)
Chantal - 2006-03-11 16:57:07
I have no casual fashion advice for the office. I'm a SAHM and the closest thing I get to an office is the school office picking up a kid who puked that day. We just moved to a small town so I know what you mean about penetrating already existing groups. The only advice I have is to use your kids? All of the friends I've made have been through something or other the kids are involved in. I also met someone through a cooking class and it turned out we both thought the teacher was a freak. In group situations I throw out really sarcastic jokes or swear. Whoever doesn't glare at me or turn away wins!
Suzanne - 2006-03-12 12:13:16
Laura, I see no one is giving you foot-sweat advice! It sounds like the Right Guard is working for you, so maybe you won't make use of this tidbit, but my spouse, Scrotie, puts Gold Bond powder in his shoes before a day in his wool socks and workboots. Maybe any kind of powder, like talcum, would work too.
Nancy F. - 2006-03-12 12:50:41
I know what you mean about lady friends.... I'm slow to make friends. I'm a very shy person IRL. And I get put off by even the most sincere and gentle of refusals and never try again. I can't give you fashion advice either, as I'm somewhat fashion challenged myself. I must be, because when I watch "What NOT to Wear"? I keep thinking I'd be a prime candidate for that show, except that I really think the two hosts should take some of their own advice.
Denise - 2006-03-13 11:23:57
Office fashion: if your office is air conditioned, keep a blazer there--navy or gray or something that goes more or less with anything. If you have to get someone to listen to you, cooperate with you, respect your opinion, or just get the heck out of your way, put the blazer on before you go talk with that person.
Then take it the heck off, because, damn, it's hot!

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